Get to know me
I am an Episcopal priest, a Certified Daring Way Facilitator, and Leadership Coach. This tells you what I do but not that much about me and why I do this work. So I’ll start at my favorite starting place: a question.
Here’s one I’m often asked, "Why did you become a priest?"
On the morning of Sept. 11, 2001, I was at my Tribeca office in New York City and stood with a handful of my coworkers looking out our windows, watching the horrific events of that day. There is more to that story, but to get to the point, it prompted an intense reassessment of my life. A deep dive into a question I was getting good at ignoring, “What are you doing?”
I had studied and pursued professional opera singing (another story) but, the uncertainty of that career was too stressful for me, so I got a real job. Coordinating people and processes at an online advertising start-up was fun and challenging. But I wanted more than fun and challenging. I wanted to do work that I believed mattered.
“So I went to a place where I thought I’d find answers. Like most former Roman Catholics who want familiar worship without all the misogyny, I found the Episcopal church.”
And when I got there, I fell in love. Not with that guy in the picture! That’s the day I was ordained and we were newly clergy colleagues. I like seeing the happiness in this picture. I’ll bet you know that feeling too. When you are really excited to get to work!
That eagerness came out of love. At church, I fell in love with a way of worship. I fell in love with talking about God and the big questions of life. I fell in love with prayer, meditation, and the practice of retreats and silence. And I must admit, I was pretty wowed by Jesus.
As Marcus Borg wrote I met Jesus again for the first time. A holy and human teacher who used stories to encourage people to constantly, (constantly!) look inward and examine their beliefs. I met a teacher who told me I was loved by God. All of me and all my stories.
Before that picture, I went through "the process" (sounds fun, right?) to get the approval of the Church, and eventually, I did. During that time I also became a mom. In 2005 with the blessing of the Episcopal Diocese of New York and baby on board, I started seminary.
Back then, I had a very different idea about the priesthood than I do now. And a pretty vague notion about the actual work of parish ministry. A job that requires more hats than one person can possibly wear, even with a collar. But, this is often true of the callings that are professions, right? We run towards them wanting one thing and we discover things we never imagined. Some are good. Some, not so much.
All of it is the process of becoming who we are. Doing the hard work of integrating what we learn through the surprises, failures and successes.
“Before you try and pluck the speck from your neighbor’s eye, take a look at the log that is in your own.”
That is the line that’s guided me all along. This teaching got me started on my own journey of self-examination and self-discovery. And I don’t hear it as a judgement or critique. What I hear is an encouragement to look within myself, and get curious.
That mindset is what led me to the work of Brené Brown on vulnerability and shame. And facilitating that work, brought me to leadership coaching, partnering with people who want to grow professionally and personally. Who want to expand their capacities beyond just their competencies. Who believe, like me, that examining who you are is the starting place for figuring out what you want to do.
This is what I am about. I believe you and I have callings and vocations bigger than one professional title, career, or job. When we find a process and a partner for self-inquiry and self-discovery we discover more of who we are and what we bring into the world. At work, at home, and everywhere else.
Thanks for reading about me and some of my story. I hope you find something on this site that supports you in yours.
Peace,
